Making it work

I've never done the non-monogamy relationship thing before. Ever. My relationship history has been very traditional (minus the whole marrying a woman, but even that was traditional by most standards.) But recently, in the last 6 months, I've ventured into new territory by dating an awesome dude and it's been refreshingly fun, low anxiety and guilt, and something that I think I could get behind. 

I have no idea if this is something I want to do long term, but for now, (and the last 6 months), it's definitely been working. No guilt if I kiss somebody else, no expectation that I'm going to call/text/Facebook him all the time. It's wonderful. And, it could be that he doesn't have social media or a cell phone, but this is like no other relationship I've ever been in before, and it's A+.

We recently went bike camping at Kanasket-Palmer State Park.  This was our 5th bike camping trip together, and our 2nd one with just the two of us. Our first was a group trip to Elkhorn Campground, followed by a solo trip to Manchester State Park in June, another group trip to Green Mountain Horse Camp, another group trip to Manchester, and finally, this fall trip to Kenasket-Palmer. 

Besides Elkhorn, this would be our longest ride together, and we were set to ride after work on a Friday afternoon. We knew it would probably get dark before getting to the campground, as it was routed to be 37 miles from his shop to camp. The route was supposed to take us mainly on trails, after we got out of Georgetown.

Friday afternoon proved to be absolutely gorgeous, with afternoon highs as we started riding in the low 70s, and the sun dipping low into the sky. As expected, as the miles wore on and the roads switched from pavement to gravel, the skys turned quickly to twilight to dusk to dark. We both run Dynamo light setups, so lights were no problem and riding and trails we didn't worry about cars. About 8 miles out from camp, we made a turn which put us onto one last highway which would carry us into camp. Not too concerned, as there was wide highway, my spirits were high as I was excited to spend a night in the woods with this man that I have really come to enjoy the company of.

Soon, however, my high spirits came crashing down, as 3 cars in a row made me question my life choices to travel by bicycle. The first truck practically buzzed us, roaring by us at a ridiculously high speed on a narrow turn. WHY?!!!???? Not necessary. The second encounter was a gigantic jeep. The passenger leaned out and yelled "Go back to Seattle Faggot." Uh, ok. Sure. The third car threw beer cans at us.

Come on Maple Valley! You're only 35 miles from Seattle. Not that far. And we weren't even impeding your travel. We were on the shoulder, are we THAT threatening?!?!

We finally made it to camp safely, made a fire, and settled in. There were some not so friendly raccoon visitors, but the boy made quick work of them (or so he thought) with some rocks thrown at them. They did come back to visit us later in the night. Snuggling up by the fire was wonderful after a summer of no fire camping with the burn ban. I sure hope we get enough rain this winter and spring to be able to have fires all next summer. Please oh please.

The next morning we slept in longer than I've ever slept in while camping (11am!), packed up camp, and made our way back to Seattle. On the way back, I decided to turn on Strava, as it definitely felt like more than 36 miles. Sure enough, it was a solid 41 miles. Google- you lied to us. But it was a beautiful lie. Auburn leaves, crunchy gravel, car-free trails. I'll take it. Especially with a man who rides bikes to empty campgrounds with me on any given Friday.


Riding on for Max

I've tried writing this post three times. Nothing quite seems right. There is absolutely no making sense of what happened to Max. I can't even comprehend that he won't be at our weekly Bikery meeting, giving his check-in that "Cross is here!" or geeking out over something bike related. It's all still too surreal.

To have a bright light like his extinguished so traumatically and violently, while halfway around the world visiting his girlfriend is just plain cruel. My thoughts and prayers are with his family and loved ones, and from the outpouring of love that I'm seeing all over Facebook, it's clear that he made quite the impact on every community and life that he touched. Even though I only knew him for a few months, he made a deep impact on me.

Hope you're riding all the bikes in the great beyond Max. We miss you and love you.

 

I'm not a religious person, but I do believe the Universe leads you where you need to be and gives you what you need, just when you need it. Late Friday night, Madi Carlson and I started the 2015 Coffeeneuring Challenge after our friend George's going away party. To adhere to the rules (silly randoneurs and their rules), we had to go at least 2 miles, and our ride to the party didn't count, since it was before the start date of the challenge (before midnight.) With a minimum distance of at least 2 miles to cover, we set out for Capitol Hill, in search of a non-sketchy park for coffee outside at 1am to officially kick of #coffeeneuring!

After practically walking our bikes  through the bar crowds spilling into the bike lanes of Pike/Pine, we made it to the Seattle University Quad, a perfectly picturesque retreat amazingly hidden from the craziness three blocks away. Madi, as the Queen of the Family Bikers (seriously, you should go camping with her sometime, she has EVERYTHING) was prepared with everything! I even forgot a cup and she had me covered! We set up our little coffee shop without walls and had an excellent first cup of coffee. I don't know about you, but I think coffee outside always tastes better. We're also bike twins-Stragglers for life.

I heard the news about Max the next day. Max is a recent graduate of Seattle University, and had been super active in the Seattle University Cycling Community, including the Cycling Team. I hadn't been on the Seattle University campus in years. I know this is woo-woo, but I'm so glad I was there when I was on Friday night (before I heard the news.)  Knowing that the SU campus was a special place for him makes me want to go back there and reflect on it more and reflect on his life more and the amazing impact he had on this world.

Sunday, I also went coffeeneuring. I went on a quick-ish ride (6 miles) to Fremont Coffee Company, followed by 11 miles through town back to the Bikery. We then one of our busiest days I've ever been around for. As I wrote in an email to our other volunteers today "There were a few minutes where all 3 work stands were being used, one person was on the floor working on a wheel, and one woman was waiting to use a stand. It was awesomely busy.  

There were numerous times, where I definitely felt Max's presence and spirit. Whether it was somebody sitting on his crazy stool, or Jose and Becca coming in from Seattle U (who had never been in before but had heard about us from somewhere), it was truly a magical day."

I know this post is rambling. I'm totally processing the unexpected death of a friend. So, if you're still here reading, hug your friends and family tighter tonight. And, keep riding, working hard, exploring, and being a good person, because that's what Max would've wanted us to do.

#30daysofbiking - No big deal?

Fall is my absolute favorite season. Crisp mornings leading to sunny afternoons, crunchy leaves, vibrant colors all around. This year, it feels like it came on all of a sudden. I don't know if it's because of the drought, but seems like I got back from my solo tour on Labor Day weekend and boom!, fall is here! All the trees are suddenly in full on autumn, it's COLD in the mornings, and wool sweaters are a must on night time rides.

Cliche as it is, the lyrics to Green Day's stupid song, "Wake Me Up When September Ends" keep running through my head: 

"Summer has come and passed
The innocent can never last
Wake me up when September ends"

Well, either I slept through the whole month of September, or it flew by in a total flash. I think it was the latter, because I definitely did some serious riding. In fact, I think I did more miles than ever before (except maybe in May for Bike to Work month...not really sure, because I don't really keep track anymore.) Anyway, it was a bonus #30daysofbiking month. I'm not entirely sure who is the official issuer of this challenge, but I saw it come across Twitter a number of times, and thought, "Yep, it's happening."  With a multi-day solo tour and BikeMS happening during September, it was a perfect month to be intentional about riding for 30 straight days. Both of my previous efforts to participate in #30daysofbiking were derailed by injuries, so I was pretty excited about another attempt.

Day 3 of my solo bike tour found things to be a bit soggy.

 

I had so many intentions about writing up my adventures, including my tour (I swear, it's coming someday), but seriously, the month ran away from me. My weekends have been spent at The Bikery,  a non-profit bike kitchen where I've been wrenching and doing social media and week nights have been a flurry of riding and dating and all sorts of good things!

But, September is over, and success! I rode all month long, completed my first solo tour, my longest 1 day ride, and rode all 30 days! Here are my non-profound thoughts now that it's over:

  • Fenders: A+. We all need them. Yes, you too dude in front of me riding down Capitol Hill.
  • I don't have a need for speed anymore. I'm perfectly content letting the Cat 6 racers battle the cars in the morning (and each other) just to get to the next red light. 
  • There's a police officer at 2nd/Union in the afternoons who helps cars exit the parking garage so they don't hit cyclists in the bike lane. I love this guy. Thanks for being there and always giving us the right of way.
  • The sound of a car going over a center lane rumble strip is the best sound you can hear while riding down a highway. It means somebody is giving you lots of passing room.
  • It's ok to ride an 80 mile charity ride on 42mm tires and a touring bike with a front basket. It just means you'll be the most comfortable one out there all day.

And now it's time for #coffeeneuring. #rideallthebikes

 

 

Dinner with a view on Night 1 of my tour.

How I Started Riding Bikes

I get this question all the time. "Marley- how in the world did you get so into bike riding?" or "You commute to work EVERY DAY by bike? How in the world did you start doing that?" Honestly, it's the only happiness I've found in my adult life. I've been running away from a deep unhappiness, lonliness, and unfulfilled life for such a long time and bicyling is the only thing that has felt right. I don't know that will continue to fill this void in my soul, but for now, it is working.

With my bike, I feel like I can explore anywhere. I can just go. I am free. I'm not constrained by anything except my own body, and that I can refuel, rest, and keep going. Nobody else but me can disappoint, betray, leave behind, or screw over. I can learn to repair broken parts on my bike, I can pump up flat tires, fix the broken spoke, and I can keep going. 

Three years ago, I was married. Shortly thereafter I was divorced. Like, really shortly therafter. 6 months after. In practical terms,  my new situation left me living on Capitol Hill with a car that I never used. In emotional terms, I was an absolute disaster. Thankfully, I lived around the corner from a super cool bike shop, had a bunch of friends who rode bikes, and were way into it when I said I wanted to ride. I quickly bought a bike, sold my car, and it's been a quick spiral down the rabbit hole. Since June of 2013, I've owned 5 different bikes, plus my membership to Pronto Cycle Share. I currently only own 3 bikes, but always have my eye out for my next steed.

Bike touring is my latest adventure, and honestly, where I've found the most enjoyment. Open roads, endless possibilities (except I usually have to be back at work by Monday), starry skies above my campsite. More to come as I find more and more to love on two wheels.